6. Vanessa

The Bride to Be

66  Vanessa comes from the Greek word phanessa, which means butterfly, and corresponds to one's free will—Butterflies Are Free. Vanessa specifically concerns the bride to be (n3:20), who exercises her choice in marriage—of her own free will—hence the beginning of the engagement period. In many ways Vanessa portrays a woman in fantasy, which isn't altogether bad, for it's what a woman wishes for, but has little or no power over. Compare the number 34, as opposed to 43, which shows the woman (43) (n49) developing her weaker side. And, as women are more prone to do this than men, romantically, that is, it's all the more acceptable. I recall my own account of the number 34, regarding Dorothy and The Wizard of Oz, in chapter 6 (n67,n76).

67  All of which compares with the Church of Philadelphia, the 6th church in the book of Revelation: ". . . behold, I have set before thee an open door, and no man can shut it: for thou hast a little strength, and hast kept my word, and hast not denied my name." Revelation 3:8  Which clearly refers to what one wishes for: "thou hast a little strength"; regarding one's free will or choice: "I have set before thee an open door." Thus alluding to the engagement period prior to marriage. Whereby Vanessa portrays the woman's wish, which is of her will: the endeavor to effect an outcome, the marriage itself, albeit the outcome may not reflect the endeavor itself.

68  And here the number 62, which is also of Vanessa (6), portrays the relationship between the Church of Philadelphia (6) and the Church of Smyrna (2), as detailed in chapter 11 (n82-83). It also signifies the grounding of the cross at its base (n6:58), regarding the marriage (7) of Mother Earth (6) and Father Sky (5) (n1:32). Where the marriage (or grafting) occurs between the sixth aspect and second aspect (62) (n11:374-375). While the number 26 suggests something similar (n36), except more from a masculine standpoint.

69  In many ways Vanessa entails the woman's mother (4) more than the woman herself (6): her mother being her dominant strength (n3:7). Which is seen by joining the numbers 4 and 6 to form the number 46, in accord with Sybil (4) and, the woman's mother (n3:17) . . ."676." Similarly, the man's father (1) and the man himself (5), are joined to form the number 15: in accord with Daphne (1) and, the man's father . . ."575." And so a marriage occurs between the qualities of the man's father, 1 and 15, and the qualities of the woman's mother, 4 and 46 . . ."777." As the numbers 14 and 56 might suggest, in accord with Rachel (14), who signifies true love (n124; n3:8). While the number 56 portrays the wedding of the bridegroom (5) to the bride (6), albeit the number 567, which is of Karen (7), applies more, as it includes the wedding day (n72). It's also part of the number 574 (560 + 7 + 7), regarding the beginning of the chapter (n6).

70  As for the number 46, I draw a parallel between the 4th church and the 6th church, the Christian Church (n1:26) and Today's Church (n1:29), in chapter 12 (n4); and illustrate the similarity between the Seven Churches of Asia and the New Church in Southern Oregon. While I allude to the Christian Church and its correspondence to the woman's will—or, her mother.

71  At last the Church of Man is compared to a woman in marriage—The Lord's Wife. But the true bride as yet to awaken, represented by the lifting of the veil or, dawning of the truth. What will be brought out in the accounts of Karen (7) and Justine (8), as signified by the numbers 567 and 5678.

"Butcher the Cows"

7. Karen

The Marriage

72  Karen comes from the Greek name Catherine, which means the pure. And here Ariadne, the wife and beloved of Dionysus, means nearly the same: the most pure. Whereby the name Kari (n11) is a cross between the two. Thus where Vanessa signifies the bride to be (n66), Karen signifies the bride unveiled, i.e., foreskin over the heart, which involves the wedding day and, the marriage itself (n1:36; n3:6). As the number 567 might suggest, Karen's number (7), which joins the bridegroom (5) to the bride (6) in marriage (7).

73  And so correlates with the Church of Laodicea, the 7th church in Revelation 3:14-22  Being the lukewarm church, it signifies the man's true intentions towards the woman, whether or not he's intent on marrying her. It's also the period the couple is most apt to experience cold feet and back down from the relationship.

74  While Karen is the bride herself who, up to this point hadn't understood her husband's intentions. She had been playing the part of the whore: continually plotting and scheming, seeking for ways leading into the indulgences of Aphrodite, goddess of love and passion. Yet like Aphrodite, Karen is a fervent and impassioned creature, who truly is pure, when held within the constraints of innocence. Oh violet Aphrodite! Indeed, Ariadne is often called an earthly Aphrodite (n15:32).

75  Thus for the sake of purity, Aphrodite is introduced to Artemis, Karen is introduced to Cindy, to which the numbers 37 and 373 apply (n92): a state of true intercourse (n88), where Karen (7) is brought within the constraints of Cindy (3), the woman's intellect. While the colors yellow (3) and violet (7) also correspond, as illustrated in Diana (9) (n92) and, on the front cover (np:6).

76  Another number which is related is 49, which is Karen's number and is 7 x 7. It's also synonymous with Pentecost: the descending of the Holy Ghost, which occurs 49 days or 7 weeks after Easter. It also means the 50th day. And oddly enough, it signifies the name Dennis: portrayed by the Greek letter delta, which means the 4th, and the word ennis, which in Greek means the 9th. Thus you have "D" (4) + "ennis" (9) or, Dennis (49) (n14; n8:23).

77  The number 49 also corresponds to the color chart, shown in part on the front cover and, in chapter 6 (n54). The colors are red (1), orange (2), yellow (3), white (4), green (5), blue (6), violet (7), gray (8), black (9) and brown (10). Whereby the number 49 depicts the colors white (4) and black (9). And, by mixing the two you get gray (8): i.e., 4 x 9 = 36, in accord with Justine (8). It's also expressed by the number 5678—the numbers between 4 and 9—again, Justine's number. And so the number 49 depicts the color gray (8) but, best expresses the contrast between white (4) and black (9) (n81). The number 50, which is also Justine's number, applies more. While it's interesting that Nevada—the 36th state (n6:67)—is called the silver state, silver being a light shade of gray and, that the 50th wedding anniversary is called the silver anniversary.

78  As the number 567 corresponds to Karen (7), and the number 78 corresponds to Justine (8)—i.e., whenever 7 precedes a number the number remains the same—it's appropriate to insert a 7 between the numbers 4 and 9 and form the expression 479: or 4 (77) 9. And here, the numbers 74 (47 read from right to left) and 79 correspond to the numbers 4 and 9 (n92). Thus signifying the addition of color, the number 7, regarding the various shades of gray, i.e., the number 49 or, 5678. The number 479 also corresponds to Cindy (3), the woman's intellect, and shows how Karen (7) is brought within constraints, similar to the number 37 above (n74).

79  The number 479 is further illustrated by the number 33: the reciprocation of Cindy (3), which culminates into Prudence (5). By inserting a 4 between the two 3's—the woman's will (n3:17)—you get 3-4-3, which corresponds to Karen (7) and, to the marriage itself. It's also 7 x 7 x 7. Thus by inserting a 7, you get 3-7-3, which corresponds to Diana (9), a state of true intercourse (n88). Finally, by inserting a 9, you get 3-9-3, which corresponds to Daphne (1), the man's intellect, whereby completing the sequence. The number 3-1-3 corresponds again to Prudence. The result, 3-479-3, which is of Cindy, shows the delineation of Karen, the focus remains on Karen, within the constraints of Cindy. The number 479 is illustrated further in chapter 8 (n1), in relation to the high priest. It's also illustrated in chapter 6 (n84), regarding the Key of David, with a similar representation as here.

80  Perhaps you can see why I began this series with the number 343, when looking at the numbers 32 and 23 (n6:80-86). Essentially reciprocals, they correspond to the numbers 4 and 9 and, to the name Dennis (49) (n75). When added, 320 (+) 023, together with, 40 (+) 09, you get 343 and 49, both of which correspond to Karen (7)—and, demonstrate how 7 is triplicated. The number 32 also signifies the highest aspect of good, the good of marriage or, celestial marriage (n7:8), as portrayed in Sybil (4) (n51): where 32 and 23 are its two reciprocals.

81  Thus it's significant that Minnesota is the 32nd state (n6:67) and, that the border between the United States and Canada is the 49th parallel or, 49 degrees latitude. Also, that the number 32 (4), and its reciprocal 23 (9), join to form 49. Which is then substantiated, for only a small tip of Minnesota—of the lower 48 states—extends above the 49th parallel, at Lake of the Woods. And so Minnesota is aptly called, The Gopher State, as it burrows into Canada. On the other hand, Alaska, the 49th state, fully extends above the 49th parallel. Which is all the more unusual!

82  It's also interesting that I discovered this shortly after my 32nd birthday, in 1988, the year 88 and number 32 corresponding to Sybil as well. And, that I found out the significance of my name at this time: that it comes from Dionysus and corresponds to the number 49. Plus it was the same year I received the 14 Images of Kari and, where (only) the image of Karen (7) wore a white (4) and black (9) striped top. Wow!

"Forage the Goats"

8. Justine

Honeymoon / Circumcision

83  Justine is the feminine of Justin, which comes from the word justice, and means the just. Regarding the marriage, Justine signifies the honeymoon, a state of exploration which, corresponds to circumcision: Abraham was instructed to circumcise all the male children of his household at the age of eight days. Similarly, the honeymoon involves lifting the veil on the wedding day (7), and it's complete removal on the wedding night (8). Much as the number 78, which joins Karen (7) to Justine (8), suggests—or, the joint correspondence of Justine (8).

84  Upon lifting the veil, the woman sees who her husband really is for the first time: the truth dawns, in accord with Karen (7). At which point she feels completely bewildered and exposed: she sees the depth of his concern and is exposed to all the whorish games she'd been playing. As a ray of sunlight touches her mind she thinks, "Wow, maybe he does love me," and sees a flame in him, comparable to the flame lit in Apollo, when he beheld the beautiful Daphne (n23). To which the numbers 75, 57 and 757 apply. Which show Karen (7) and Prudence (5), or the bridegroom (75), together with Daphne (1), the man's intellect or his father (57 and 757).

85  Yet Karen was unstable to begin with, and upon receiving this awe-ful insight she goes berserk, and rushes off wildly into the state of Justine. The honeymoon usually is pretty wild. What I like to compare to a big dog on a leash, a wolf? tied to a stake driven into the ground, as it undergoes obedience training. And so corresponds to Karen's heart (7)—or, Heart of the Matter (n8:9)—from which the dog pulls until the leash is taught, symbolically in the husband's hand, and proceeds to circumscribe a circle around the area defined by its length or radius. While in accord with The Bear and the Garbage Can in chapter 9 (17-21), Justine appears to shed the bearskin of ignorance.

86  Whereby circumcision is performed and the bridal veil removed, the foreskin over the heart, allowing justice to become manifest. The dog then begins to explore the territory within the circle, in accord with the exploration state or honeymoon. And, as it begins to settle down, the way is prepared for Diana (9) and her hounds, who was known for the hunting dogs she kept, signifying a state of instruction, regarding the master's voice and, infilling of the spirit or the soul (n76,89; n7:10; n8:10; n13:56).

87  Circumcision also signifies work, for it's through work that justice becomes manifest. To work like a dog? And, as it pertains to the body or flesh (n8:10), it seems fitting that Adam was commanded to work by the sweat of his brow to atone for his ignorance (n85). Genesis 3:17-19  While Apollo had to serve the mortal King Admetus eight years to atone for his! (n7:12). And what do they mean by putting in an eight hour day? While in late 1989 I had a vision of my wordprocessor on my desk, the screen tilted up saying, Justine. And I knew it was time to start working on this book. Although the first thing I wrote was the letter to David two years before, which is now part of chapter 8 (n1). Which suggests the same thing! ". . .and the veil was lifted."

"Fleece the Sheep"

9. Diana

True Intercourse

88  Diana is the Roman form of Artemis, the moon goddess, virgin, and twin sister to Apollo. See Cindy (n39). And here I have a second cousin named Diana, which Kari's 9th image reminded me the most—Diana being a distant cousin of Artemis. Thus it's significant how I derived the name! (n1:20). As Diana's number is 9, it's also 3 x 3 or, Cindy x Cindy . . ."373." Whereby the moon's death number is 3 x 3. It's also the age at which young girls were initiated into her cult, and brings to mind the nine Muses, the female entourage of Apollo, who were also virgins. While at Apollo's birth, Artemis assisted a full nine days before he was delivered.

89  Once circumcision occurs, in accord with Justine (8), Diana signifies a state of true intercourse: regarding the soul and accompanied good pleasure, as the wife surrenders to her husband's profound truth (his penis). Hence the enhancement of a man's sensitivity towards his wife, both sexually and emotionally, and contributes to the felicity of marriage. Whereby drawing specific focus to the genitals and encouraging the man to take his time and savor the wine, from an erotic standpoint. Unlike the beasts of the field, where sex is an occasional matter and usually short in duration, involving little of one's mental faculties.

90  Circumcision can also mean the opposite. As this part of the body, through exposure and or abuse, loses its sensitivity and becomes calloused or dull, almost like it never occurred. What I believe reflects the Christian Church of today, which has lost most of its vitality and, where great ignorance persists. And while likely true, the idea clearly alludes to what is erotic and sensitive in nature, making it the more plausible explanation.

91  And so man is aided in his role as procreator, where his highest creative energy is aimed towards the procreation of young. And being created in God's Image, it soon becomes clear—that God copulates! (n7:7). This is what the whole of nature suggests, as sexual reproduction is the norm for most species. While the earth, often called God's footstool, is the foundation for everything of a higher order: heaven has its point of reference. Similarly, "A tree maintains its roots in the soil." All of which is best portrayed through the activities of Zeus, who indeed was sexual in nature. Also, one only need consider the Hindus and their various portrayals of God, many of which are graphic and sexually explicit.

92  A number that typifies Diana most is 37, which joins Cindy (3), the woman's intellect, with Karen (7), the bride unveiled (n75). While the number 373 also corresponds and is essentially the same: whenever a number is joined to 7, with the 7 preceding, such as 74, the 7 can be dropped or remain silent, which leaves the number 4 (n78). Thus when taking the numbers 37 and 73, which is 73—read from right to left (37), then left to right (73)—you come up with 3 (77) 3. The number 77 still corresponds to 7 which, is silent in either direction or, silent altogether. Leaving the numbers 373 and 303—or, 3 and 3, i.e., 3 x 3 = 9—all of which correspond to Diana (9).

93  Regarding the meditation practice at the beginning of the book (n6) and, in chapter 19 (n1), the colors yellow (3) and violet (7) are predominant but, are only present when a true exchange takes place. When the good of truth (yellow), corresponds to the good of love (violet), both of which are reciprocals. i.e., yellow and violet being opposites. When this occurs, violet clouds begin to spill out in my mind, and yellow smoke begins to form around the edges. Whereby the number 37 becomes 373, as the smoke ring completes itself.

94  Thus a smoke ring forms and begins to diminish in size, until a new one forms to take its place, and so it progresses. As this occurs, it signifies a coming to terms or, resolution of what I was meditating on; and is similar to the meditation Roy Masters teaches (n19:6). When this happens, violet and yellow clouds begin to form, and swirl and roll gently as they ascend upwards, into heaven. While I understand many souls are lifted up at this time, often whole societies, which I can attest to from experience.

"Slaughter the Lamb"

10. Joyce

Ecstasy / Orgasm

95  Derived from the word joy, Joyce signifies a man's objectivity—at its height—and is akin to a spiritual release. And, in accord with Diana (9), corresponds to sexual orgasm, which I don't believe is possible unless a man remains objective through the experience. Perhaps explaining the nature of impotence? From Aries (1) to Capricorn (10)—the Ram to the Goat—Joyce is the height of man as man (10) and, represents a state prior to conception, before being joinied to what is feminine and reciprocative (01): i.e., 10 + 01 = 11 (n6,105,155; n6:107; n8:13-15).

96  In effect it suggests mutual orgasm, on behalf of both men and women, as signified by the number 101, which corresponds to Cindy (3). And here, the masculine (10) and the feminine (01) elements approach at the moment of climax (101), prior to mutual union (11), as the husband and wife slip into the bath and undergo mutual baptism, portrayed by the zero between the two ones. Similarly, the embryo (11), the joining of the father and the mother (n3:4), is bathed in the elements of the womb. I discuss baptism further in Penelope (11), regarding the thought stream and construction of a reservoir (n107).

97  One thing I should convey, is that unless a woman experiences orgasm or, has that capacity, it's not possible for a man to experience orgasm—in the spiritual sense. For when men and women are joined interiorly, the two are joined and become one flesh—or, one human being (n3:2-5). Their souls are so united that the wife is given to think what her husband thinks, which is of the understanding (n3:18), and the husband is given to feel what his wife feels, which is of the will (n3:20). Such is the harmony in their relationship and, is how it's portrayed in heaven.

98  Thus if a couple were so united, it's conceivable the man couldn't experience orgasm without his wife knowing about it: she's going to feel the same thing. While I understand the angels of heaven, those who have died and gone to heaven, experience exactly this in their relating to each other. And so it seems fitting that a man's experience be in accord with what a woman experiences. After all, making love, even of an earthly union, so long as it's genuine, is a spiritual act, and the man is making love to a woman: in spirit or, his idea of a woman (n7:45).

99  When mutual orgasm is experienced, it's significant that the chances of conceiving a boy child are increased. Due in part to the alkalinity of the man's semen and, to the amount of acid secreted from the woman's vagina, which tends to destroy a majority of sperm before reaching the womb. Being a condition that normally favors the gynosperm, the female sperm, it increases the likelihood of conceiving a girl. On the other hand, when a woman experiences orgasm and discharges her semen, which is alkaline in content, the acid in the vagina is neutralized and gets washed out. Producing a condition favorable to the androsperm, the male sperm, and increases the likelihood of conceiving a boy. While this is a tradition that dates back to old Jewish times, giving more credence to my experience in chapter 7, regarding the number 444 and position ten (n41-43).

100  And so concerns the exploits of Dionysus, where only male children were popping up, born to one of his many nurses; and so the myth goes. Being the god of ecstasy, it's conceivable they were born of a state conducive to mutual orgasm—101. While it's equally interesting that my rebirth experience occurred along Highway 101 in Northern California, off the shoulder along the Russian River. With the number 101 sharing a similar significance to this joining of two minds. It occurred along the river, the thought stream, and the child that was born was a boy. I speak of this further in Judith (12) (n111), and go into full detail in the next chapter (n5:1).

101  Finally there's the number 10, which is musically the same as the number 3, except it's arranged in the next octave (n3,5). And so reflects Cindy (3), the woman's intellect, who's concerned with innocence and perpetual virginity. And clearly shows the connection between the numbers 10 and 101 (Joyce and Cindy). The number 10 also corresponds to Virginia, the 10th state (n6:67), and signifies a woman's innocence. Making Joyce indicative to the Virgin Conception, which is all the more unusual, for I was conceived in Virginia (n44).

"Break the Horses"